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Definition 2024

(colloquial, vulgar, humorous) It is fruitless to speculate about counterfactual situations.
"We would have won the match if we'd had a decent goalkeeper."
"And if my aunt had balls, she'd be my uncle!"

proverb

Albanian: Po të kish halla loqe, do e quanin dajë (if my aunt had balls, she'd be my uncle)
Finnish: jos tädillä olis' munat, se olis' setä
French: avec des si on mettrait Paris en bouteille (fr), si ma tante en avait, on l'appellerait mon oncle
German: wenn das Wörtchen "wenn" nicht wär, wär mein Vater Millionär (if the word "if" didn't exist, my father would be millionaire)
Greek: αν η γιαγιά μου είχε αρχίδια θα τη φώναζα παππού ‎(an i giagiá mou eíche archídia tha ti fónaza pappoú)
Polish: gdyby babcia miała wąsy, to by była dziadkiem, gdyby ciocia miała wąsy, toby była wujkiem
Russian: е́сли бы да кабы́ во рту́ вы́росли грибы́, то был бы не рот, а це́лый огоро́д ‎(jésli by da kabý vo rtú výrosli gribý, to byl by ne rot, a célyj ogoród) (if and when mushrooms would grow in the mouth, it would not be a mouth but a whole garden), е́сли бы у ба́бушки был хуй, она́ была́ бы де́душкой ‎(jésli by u bábuški byl xuj, oná bylá by déduškoj) (vulgar: if the granny had a cock, she'd be the grandpa)

Spanish: si mi abuela tuviera ruedas, sería una bicicleta (es) (if my grandmother had wheels, she'd be a bicycle)
Turkish: halamın taşakları olsaydı, amcam olurdu (if my aunt had balls, she'd be my uncle)